Hola amigos! I’ve been in Mexico writing my third book, and I feel called to share some tips that have worked for me as I’ve gotten ~in flow~. Keep in mind that I failed the only writing class I ever took. But if you’re like me and not a particularly
“Write at a small desk” is soooo true!! ⭐️ I noticed the ‘distance’ I have from my laptop mirrors the distance I feel toward the topic. Work emails — the further away, the better. Substack newsletters? My best ones have always come when I am curled up in bed (throwing my back out when I am done). See #1: the need for squats. Thank you Mari!!! 🌸🌷❤️🔥
Thank you for sharing all this valuable insight! It makes me understand more abt why certain things I write come across as "perfect" (aka so authentically me) and others feel fake or surface level. This essay made me think abt who I'm writing said perfect pieces to, and I realized it was my inner child. It's amazing how I've been trying to soothe her all these years with my writing, even before therapy taught me abt inner child work. Gosh, humans are so fascinating lol. I haven't written in a while, but this new insight is stirring my creative juices again✍️📖 As usual, thank you for doing what you do - it makes me feel so seen❤️
Omg that is SO sweet. I love writing to Little Mari too! I remember a powerful dream I had many years ago where I met with Child Me and we had a little talk and it was so healing. A while later, I learned about "inner child work," which confirms to me that our bodies are so wise and know so much about healing even without fancy therapy terms (though I am very pro-therapy!). I really hope you write again soon!
Mari!! Your timing is impeccable! I've finally returned to my writing project after a near 3 mo. hiatus and the rust is REAL. I spent the past two days chipping away to find my groove again. When this popped into my inbox, it became the refreshing bottle (yes the big boy) of Topo Chico I needed. Up until this point, my "SAM" was a collection of cheerleaders in my corner (MY mom also included), but when I realized that my story MUST be a lot darker, I also realized it might NOT be those same cheerleaders' cuppa. I recently stumbled upon a writer who publishes musings inspired by his work at a crisis call center. Dark to say the least. Having him inside my brain has helped me dig deeper into the piece I'm working on this weekend. I'm also obsessed with what you said about "Forget Logic." It's so easy to fall prey to cliched turns of phrase. Such a good reminder (and way more fun) to push ourselves out of our native language's comfort zone. "Break Your Own Heart" is that final bite I often leave on my plate because I fear I'm too full. But I know it's something I need to ingest to make the meal complete. It's terrifying to put your whole vulnerable heart out there, but such a must. And finally, "Surprise Yourself" is what got me into the mess I'm in (writing bits and pieces that flow out of me but now need a genuine plot line story arc), but I have to trust the mystical path that led me deep into these woods. This gave me an entire vat of faith: "Be weird, be incomprehensible, be spooky, be strange, be the you that you learned how to quiet down a long time ago. I want to read that version of you!" I cannot WAIT to pull up to the feast you're cookin up for us. And thank you for nourishing those dear strays while you're at it.
Of course our timing is synced! This surprises me ZERO. But makes me SO happy to hear that you've returned to the rust, which I'm certain is exactly where you should be.
I haven't seen Poor Things yet, but I was reading about how Yorgos Lanthimos had it in his brain for years but he wouldn't let himself make such a weird film until he had proven that he could make more palatable ones (that are still pretty weird). I could totally relate to that, but also thought about how much more freedom there is for non-famous-directors to just write whatever they want--really indulge in their inner strangeness--and, truly, ultimately, who CARES if it's not "successful." Thank goddess for the writer in your brain helping you with that big shovel to dig deeper and deeper.
I was also thinking about how connected we are as kids to the weird spooky strangeness of life and we permit ourselves to really "go there" (I asked for a biography about Hitler for Christmas when I was 10...) but then we start covering that all up with social acceptableness. And then our indulgence in the strange comes out in highly specific ways, like listening to true crime podcasts, when we could be dipping our toes into the dark and making the monsters real with a tad bit more creativity.
These are the types of things your comments make me think about. :)
I raise my Topo in cheers to your renewed adventure!!!
The Yorgos Lanthimos bit reminds me of how oddball "arthouse" films are finally making a mainstream comeback after what feels like decades of mainstream palatability... there's so much more inspiration to break out of safety and bust into the weird! Speaking of your 10-year-old fascination with Hitler, all the Larry David Elmo drama that went on last week got me thinking about how Elmo was a distinct generational divider between the trippy weird children's TV and film productions of the 70s and 80s (Sesame St included!) and the more tame, wholesome productions that became popular in the 90s (Sesame St included). Kids probably do need tame and wholesome in that early development phase, but I hope they also get a healthy dose of the weird, the trippy, and even the disturbing to tell them it's ok to explore the dark side!
You're getting me all excited to just return writing to my journal again with these tips ✨ Have you thought of the title for your new book yet? 😍 I love how you mentioned about mimicking the mannerisms of the person in front of you! Coming from India, I switch accents when I am in a room with someone who's speaking English with an American accent versus someone with an Indian accent! And funnily enough, the Indian accent picks up a lot of British English pronunciations - I don't know how I'm able to switch accents so subconsciously, I must sound incredibly ridiculous! I have so many questions to ask you about this entire writing process Mari!!! How do you feel about ChatGPT or using AI to write? If you're in Mexico writing and wish to describe something about New York, is it easy to do so from memory or do you have to wait until you get back in order to experience it again and then write about it? Also, I graduate on May 17, so I'm bummed about not making it to the Retreat 😕 And I have no idea how much life is going to look like after I graduate (being an international student and all that) but will definitely try to sign up for the Wyoming one! All my love for you Mari! PS. I come to your work when I am seeking some rhythm in my brain 🎶and thank you for introducing your blueberries to other works as well!
The title for my book is the first thing I thought of, even before I had a concept for the book yet!! But it worked out :) I think I get to reveal it once we have a publication date set. Stay tuned!
Haaa, it always catches me off-guard when my Indian friends talk to their parents in an Indian accent and it's like, "Wait, who are you??" It seems completely subconscious for them. But I suppose we all code-switch depending on context (my "making an appointment on the phone" voice is completely different from how I talk to my cat, for instance ;) so maybe it's more natural than we think!
I feel GREAT about using ChatGPT to write! Funny, I was totally prepared to use it a lot during the process in Mexico but I haven't used it at all? Maybe I will later when I start editing and finessing. I find it really helpful for getting a phrase right or making connections that aren't coming together easily.
All my love for you my beloved blueberry and can't wait to meet you at some point some day!!!
"forget logic" resonates here! I just used a line when writing about outer cape beaches "and believe me when I give this sermon" and that felt serendipitous to reading your line "you are the Pope of your story". yes!!
Really enjoyed reading this, 4 and 9 really resonated. A great reminder of where the focus should be - and how important it is to remain open and vulnerable to connect with readers. Thanks!
Eeeek! I just signed up for your retreat in North Carolina! I am so excited, and also a little nervous! You are someone who I have followed for YEARS and I'm excited to learn from you in person!
Loved this so much, particularly writing to someone else. I've always wrote to the man I've been lucky to love for 13 years and he's a brilliant muse as is the younger/future versions of myself - this also helps me connect with your other tip around breaking your own heart, writing for what I need and then that, in my experience, translates to what the reader needs without trying - thank you Mari 🌼
Mari! Thank you for this! I'm trying to get back in touch with the part of me who loved writing poetic pose/poetry, and I'm taking what you say to heart. "When you’re writing, you get to decide what’s sacred or not" is singlehandedly one of the best pieces of advice I've received on writing. I still have the art piece I made of your quote (from an old old post/essay) on my wall: "Living on Earth should break my heart every day, and living on Earth should lift my heart every day." All my love!
All your tips are helpful to me as a new writer. I often get in my own way. I especially like the idea of warming up with other writer’s work and having a Musical playlist. FYI Buechner is one of my favorites but never thought about using his work as a springboard. Rosemerry Wahtola Trummer has been an inspiration for my poetry. Thanks for your tips. Good luck with your book.
Can’t wait to read your book, Mari. I’ve been a fan of yours now for so long.. and I’m always grateful when a creative like you gets through a book and stays so grounded..while also staying dreamy… haha. Would love to meet you someday and/or talk writing. I’m
working on some essays/stories/book about my hospital/ home experience in the last year and all the ways my son’s heart being healed has changed me, or maybe showed me more of who I am, and who we are as humans… much love
“Write at a small desk” is soooo true!! ⭐️ I noticed the ‘distance’ I have from my laptop mirrors the distance I feel toward the topic. Work emails — the further away, the better. Substack newsletters? My best ones have always come when I am curled up in bed (throwing my back out when I am done). See #1: the need for squats. Thank you Mari!!! 🌸🌷❤️🔥
Thank you for sharing all this valuable insight! It makes me understand more abt why certain things I write come across as "perfect" (aka so authentically me) and others feel fake or surface level. This essay made me think abt who I'm writing said perfect pieces to, and I realized it was my inner child. It's amazing how I've been trying to soothe her all these years with my writing, even before therapy taught me abt inner child work. Gosh, humans are so fascinating lol. I haven't written in a while, but this new insight is stirring my creative juices again✍️📖 As usual, thank you for doing what you do - it makes me feel so seen❤️
Omg that is SO sweet. I love writing to Little Mari too! I remember a powerful dream I had many years ago where I met with Child Me and we had a little talk and it was so healing. A while later, I learned about "inner child work," which confirms to me that our bodies are so wise and know so much about healing even without fancy therapy terms (though I am very pro-therapy!). I really hope you write again soon!
Mari!! Your timing is impeccable! I've finally returned to my writing project after a near 3 mo. hiatus and the rust is REAL. I spent the past two days chipping away to find my groove again. When this popped into my inbox, it became the refreshing bottle (yes the big boy) of Topo Chico I needed. Up until this point, my "SAM" was a collection of cheerleaders in my corner (MY mom also included), but when I realized that my story MUST be a lot darker, I also realized it might NOT be those same cheerleaders' cuppa. I recently stumbled upon a writer who publishes musings inspired by his work at a crisis call center. Dark to say the least. Having him inside my brain has helped me dig deeper into the piece I'm working on this weekend. I'm also obsessed with what you said about "Forget Logic." It's so easy to fall prey to cliched turns of phrase. Such a good reminder (and way more fun) to push ourselves out of our native language's comfort zone. "Break Your Own Heart" is that final bite I often leave on my plate because I fear I'm too full. But I know it's something I need to ingest to make the meal complete. It's terrifying to put your whole vulnerable heart out there, but such a must. And finally, "Surprise Yourself" is what got me into the mess I'm in (writing bits and pieces that flow out of me but now need a genuine plot line story arc), but I have to trust the mystical path that led me deep into these woods. This gave me an entire vat of faith: "Be weird, be incomprehensible, be spooky, be strange, be the you that you learned how to quiet down a long time ago. I want to read that version of you!" I cannot WAIT to pull up to the feast you're cookin up for us. And thank you for nourishing those dear strays while you're at it.
Of course our timing is synced! This surprises me ZERO. But makes me SO happy to hear that you've returned to the rust, which I'm certain is exactly where you should be.
I haven't seen Poor Things yet, but I was reading about how Yorgos Lanthimos had it in his brain for years but he wouldn't let himself make such a weird film until he had proven that he could make more palatable ones (that are still pretty weird). I could totally relate to that, but also thought about how much more freedom there is for non-famous-directors to just write whatever they want--really indulge in their inner strangeness--and, truly, ultimately, who CARES if it's not "successful." Thank goddess for the writer in your brain helping you with that big shovel to dig deeper and deeper.
I was also thinking about how connected we are as kids to the weird spooky strangeness of life and we permit ourselves to really "go there" (I asked for a biography about Hitler for Christmas when I was 10...) but then we start covering that all up with social acceptableness. And then our indulgence in the strange comes out in highly specific ways, like listening to true crime podcasts, when we could be dipping our toes into the dark and making the monsters real with a tad bit more creativity.
These are the types of things your comments make me think about. :)
I raise my Topo in cheers to your renewed adventure!!!
The Yorgos Lanthimos bit reminds me of how oddball "arthouse" films are finally making a mainstream comeback after what feels like decades of mainstream palatability... there's so much more inspiration to break out of safety and bust into the weird! Speaking of your 10-year-old fascination with Hitler, all the Larry David Elmo drama that went on last week got me thinking about how Elmo was a distinct generational divider between the trippy weird children's TV and film productions of the 70s and 80s (Sesame St included!) and the more tame, wholesome productions that became popular in the 90s (Sesame St included). Kids probably do need tame and wholesome in that early development phase, but I hope they also get a healthy dose of the weird, the trippy, and even the disturbing to tell them it's ok to explore the dark side!
You're getting me all excited to just return writing to my journal again with these tips ✨ Have you thought of the title for your new book yet? 😍 I love how you mentioned about mimicking the mannerisms of the person in front of you! Coming from India, I switch accents when I am in a room with someone who's speaking English with an American accent versus someone with an Indian accent! And funnily enough, the Indian accent picks up a lot of British English pronunciations - I don't know how I'm able to switch accents so subconsciously, I must sound incredibly ridiculous! I have so many questions to ask you about this entire writing process Mari!!! How do you feel about ChatGPT or using AI to write? If you're in Mexico writing and wish to describe something about New York, is it easy to do so from memory or do you have to wait until you get back in order to experience it again and then write about it? Also, I graduate on May 17, so I'm bummed about not making it to the Retreat 😕 And I have no idea how much life is going to look like after I graduate (being an international student and all that) but will definitely try to sign up for the Wyoming one! All my love for you Mari! PS. I come to your work when I am seeking some rhythm in my brain 🎶and thank you for introducing your blueberries to other works as well!
Awww my sweet angel, you really keep me going!!!
The title for my book is the first thing I thought of, even before I had a concept for the book yet!! But it worked out :) I think I get to reveal it once we have a publication date set. Stay tuned!
Haaa, it always catches me off-guard when my Indian friends talk to their parents in an Indian accent and it's like, "Wait, who are you??" It seems completely subconscious for them. But I suppose we all code-switch depending on context (my "making an appointment on the phone" voice is completely different from how I talk to my cat, for instance ;) so maybe it's more natural than we think!
I feel GREAT about using ChatGPT to write! Funny, I was totally prepared to use it a lot during the process in Mexico but I haven't used it at all? Maybe I will later when I start editing and finessing. I find it really helpful for getting a phrase right or making connections that aren't coming together easily.
All my love for you my beloved blueberry and can't wait to meet you at some point some day!!!
"forget logic" resonates here! I just used a line when writing about outer cape beaches "and believe me when I give this sermon" and that felt serendipitous to reading your line "you are the Pope of your story". yes!!
Loved these!! I hate when writing tips feel too ‘this is the only way’ but these were personal and made me smile!!
Really enjoyed reading this, 4 and 9 really resonated. A great reminder of where the focus should be - and how important it is to remain open and vulnerable to connect with readers. Thanks!
Eeeek! I just signed up for your retreat in North Carolina! I am so excited, and also a little nervous! You are someone who I have followed for YEARS and I'm excited to learn from you in person!
Loved this so much, particularly writing to someone else. I've always wrote to the man I've been lucky to love for 13 years and he's a brilliant muse as is the younger/future versions of myself - this also helps me connect with your other tip around breaking your own heart, writing for what I need and then that, in my experience, translates to what the reader needs without trying - thank you Mari 🌼
This issue is such a gift. Thank you for this helpful advice and your beautiful words/genuine way of looking at the world!
Do squats and forget logic are some of my favorite pieces of advice 😂🩵🙌🏼 Loved this post!
Mari! Thank you for this! I'm trying to get back in touch with the part of me who loved writing poetic pose/poetry, and I'm taking what you say to heart. "When you’re writing, you get to decide what’s sacred or not" is singlehandedly one of the best pieces of advice I've received on writing. I still have the art piece I made of your quote (from an old old post/essay) on my wall: "Living on Earth should break my heart every day, and living on Earth should lift my heart every day." All my love!
All your tips are helpful to me as a new writer. I often get in my own way. I especially like the idea of warming up with other writer’s work and having a Musical playlist. FYI Buechner is one of my favorites but never thought about using his work as a springboard. Rosemerry Wahtola Trummer has been an inspiration for my poetry. Thanks for your tips. Good luck with your book.
I will look forward to hearing more about your book! Love this list.
Can’t wait to read your book, Mari. I’ve been a fan of yours now for so long.. and I’m always grateful when a creative like you gets through a book and stays so grounded..while also staying dreamy… haha. Would love to meet you someday and/or talk writing. I’m
working on some essays/stories/book about my hospital/ home experience in the last year and all the ways my son’s heart being healed has changed me, or maybe showed me more of who I am, and who we are as humans… much love
I love this list and it inspires me to get back to my morning pages practice keeping many of these in mind. Thank you!